Dying to Yourself with Geoff Van De Merwe

Conflict Humility Marriage Men's Roundtable Mrt Re|Engage

Dying to Yourself with Geoff Van De Merwe

Chris Rivers

In season one, episode nine, Chris Rivers, Jeremy Mayer, and Geoff Van De Merwe, a member of Grace Church’s Pelham campus, discuss Geoff’s participation in the re|engage program at Grace Church and the life change that took place in his marriage, family, and walk with the Lord.

Download Episode 9 Study Questions and then share, listen, and discuss in a one on one conversation or with a group of men.

APPLICATION

  • What are some ways you have seen God work in your life through participation in re|engage, re:gen, a Men’s Roundtable study, or another ministry area of the church? What is one thing you learned about yourself through this process? What did you learn about God?
  • When did you first realize your need for God? What changes took place in your life after you made this decision?
  • What evidence do you see in your life of how God is changing you and stretching you?
  • How can you be “deliberate in your steps?” What would this look like on a practical level?

KEY POINTS

  • Geoff and his wife began attending Grace Church with the hopes of helping their children and providing a positive environment for them. While not believers themselves, they had seen how Grace’s Forge ministry had positively affected their oldest son’s life, and they wanted to get their family plugged into a church. They heard about the re|engage ministry on their first visit and decided to attend the following week. With their marriage in crisis, they were instantly met with compassion and acceptance. Their current ways of thinking and relating to one another were challenged and they began to break down walls of resentment and anger.
  • Through their experience in re|engage, Geoff and his wife, Emily, also became aware of their need for God and made the decision to begin a personal relationship with Christ. Up until this point, Geoff had seen Jesus as a good man and teacher. He was now able to see Jesus as his Savior and take steps to depend on God and release control of his life. This decision spurred Geoff to begin reading his Bible, talking to God on a regular basis, and taking small steps to restore his relationship with his wife and reconnect with his family.
  • The combination of participating in re|engage and deciding to follow Christ led to tremendous life change. Geoff was able to lay down his anger and release the turmoil he had been keeping inside. He learned about the concept of “staying in your circle,” a principle discussed in re|engage, and began taking responsibility rather than blaming his wife for the problems in their marriage. As he and his wife began to function as one unit, with God in the center, they began talking more and fighting less. They were able to use this energy to pour into their children’s lives and into their relationship. Geoff saw his marriage and family transformed.
  • Geoff’s story reveals the importance of being deliberate in our decision making and the way we lead our lives. By avoiding passivity, depending on God, and seeking what God would have us to do in every situation, we can move towards the abundant life God has for us.

SCRIPTURE REFERENCES

  • For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. Matthew 12:34 (ESV)
  • We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2 Corinthians 10:5 (NIV)

RESOURCES

Learn more about the re|engage ministry at Grace Church at: https://gracechurchsc.org/connect/pastoral-care/re-engage

Unoffendable Book LINK

Join a Men’s Roundtable study by finding a campus near you and register for Authentic Manhood at: gracechurchsc.org/mrt

If you know a man who would benefit from hearing this episode, share it with him. Having intentional conversations around these principles is a great way to disciple and help others move towards Christ.

Have questions or want us to discuss a topic? Email us at: menatgrace@gracechurchsc.org.