“I do it myself!!” my toddler screamed at me for what felt like the hundredth time that day. After a full day of solo parenting a two-and-a-half-year-old, to say I was over it was a massive understatement. In that moment, I came to the most unsettling realization: I am no different from this pint-sized human trying to put her socks on (upside down and inside out, mind you). How many times have people offered me wisdom or guidance for me to reject it because I think I am the authority in my own life? How often have I refused to confess sin because I didn’t want people to think I am anything but perfect and competent? If I can be a good person and still live for myself, then why would I ever feel like I need to be involved in the local church?

I had never realized how deeply I had buried myself under the sin of self-reliance, self-protection and control than when I entered the most isolating season of my life. My husband had been working long hours to finish his medical residency, I was struggling with severe postpartum depression after having our oldest daughter, and I left my beloved career to become a stay-at-home mom, all during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic. For a while, I doubled down on my sin patterns, but the longer this went on, the more I felt myself cracking under a weight I was never meant to bear. Not only did I miss having community, but I realized that a gaping hole in my walk with Christ was accountability and vulnerability.

In a culture that values individualism and autonomy over most other things, the lie that we don’t need the local church is more pervasive than ever. The natural bent of our sinful hearts is to isolate ourselves from one another and remain in a perpetual “me, myself, and I” mindset. But when we study Scripture, we see that there are four main reasons why we need the local church:

1. We need to sit under teaching (Colossians 3:16, Romans 10:17).
2. We need to confess our sin to one another (James 5:16, Proverbs 27:17).
3. We need to be in community with other believers and share one another’s burdens (Hebrews 10:24–25, Galatians 6:2).
4. We need to serve something greater than ourselves (Mark 10:45, 1 Peter 4:10–11).

As tempting as it is to pick which reason we “like the best,” we have to treat them with equal weight. We cannot come to church looking for friends for coffee dates but reject the vulnerability and accountability that community brings. We cannot fill a seat to listen to teaching that we will never apply to our lives or refuse to sacrifice a bit of our Sunday to serve in some capacity. God wants to help us embrace his church and live in the truth that he holds out for us throughout his Word..

When we moved to Greenville in the summer of 2023, I felt the Holy Spirit’s conviction to find a local church, start serving immediately and to begin the practice of radical vulnerability. It will be a lifelong process, but as I have confessed sin and been held accountable through our community, I’ve seen God transform my life and the way I see the local church. I am known by the people around me, I can use my gifts and talents to serve within the body, and day by day, there seems to be a little bit less of me and a little more of him (John 3:30).

So I leave you with this question: what do you have to lose? Of all the vehicles God could’ve chosen to get his work done on earth, in his infinite wisdom, He picked the church—imperfect people, saved by grace through the Gospel, serving and caring for one another, and doing this while in a pitched battle with their own leftover sin. He must want to help us embrace and fully experience all He has for us through His church.

Taylor Lewis

For the Women at Grace Newsletter Team

Colossians 3:9–17 → “Don’t lie to each other, for you have stripped off your old sinful nature and all its wicked deeds. Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him. In this new life, it doesn’t matter if you are a Jew or a Gentile, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbaric, uncivilized, slave, or free. Christ is all that matters, and he lives in all of us. Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful. Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.”

John 15:5–8 → “Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing. Anyone who does not remain in me is thrown away like a useless branch and withers. Such branches are gathered into a pile to be burned. But if you remain in me and my words remain in you, you may ask for anything you want, and it will be granted! When you produce much fruit, you are my true disciples. This brings great glory to my Father.”

Hebrews 10:23–25 → “Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise. Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. And let us not neglect meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.”

Allie Black

For the Women at Grace Newsletter Team

1. Where do I see tendencies of self-reliance in my own walk with God?
   In what areas am I tempted to say “I can do it myself” instead of submitting to God’s Word or the wisdom of others?
2. How open am I to accountability and community right now?
   What keeps me from confessing sin or letting others into my struggles, and what might it look like to practice vulnerability this week?
3. Am I fully participating in the life of the local church?
   Am I sitting under teaching, living in community, and serving others—or am I only engaging with the parts that feel comfortable or convenient?
4. In what ways have I believed the lie that I don’t need the local church?

Consider memorizing John 15:5 and/or Hebrews 10:23–25 to help battle this lie with the truth of God’s Word.

Nathalie Richard

For the Women at Grace Newsletter Team